Every owner hits a stretch where the work dries up, a key person walks, or a big job goes bad. The owners who last are not the ones who never get hit. They are the ones who know what to do after.
Dr. Taryn Marie Stejskal, founder and CEO of the Resilience Leadership Institute, has studied this for years. She led executive leadership development at Nike and wrote The Five Practices of Highly Resilient People. On Driven To Win episode 445, she told Chaz Wolfe what happened when she left Nike weeks before the pandemic, and what she learned about building resilience as a business owner.
What does resilience mean for a business owner?
Resilience is how well you face hard moments and what you become because of them. Taryn sums up those moments as the big three Cs: "challenge, change and complexity."
For a contractor, that looks like a lost bid you counted on, a supplier price jump, a foreman who quits in the busy season, or a slow winter. Taryn says these moments can feel bigger than you. She calls it "a profoundly lonely, scary experience." That is normal. It does not mean you are weak. It means you are the one at the top.
Why is "bouncing back" the wrong goal?
Because you never go back to how things were. Taryn is blunt about it: "Nobody bounces back."
She says we don't go back to the way we were before, "we bounce forward." After a hard season, the goal is not to rebuild the old business. The goal is to build a better one with what the hit taught you.
So after a bad job or a bad year, ask three questions. What broke? What did it teach us? What will we do different from now on? Write the answers down. Then change one thing in how you run the company.
What did her own setback look like?
Taryn left Nike in February 2020. She had speaking, coaching and workshop work lined up. Most of it was based on handshakes and email agreements. Then March came and it was gone.
She was a single mom of two young boys with a mortgage. She took no outside investment. In her words, "I was on a 30 day burn rate for 36 months." Every month she had to find the cash to pay herself and pay the people who worked for her.
Any owner who has made payroll on a thin month knows that feeling. Her story is a good reminder. A verbal yes is not a booked job. Plan your cash around what is signed.
When should you push through and when should you pivot?
Push when the work is hard but the market still wants it. Pivot when the market has moved. Taryn calls this productive perseverance.
Grit is good, but she warns there are times when "it is not helpful to be gritty." Her example is Blockbuster. "Blockbuster was super gritty, man." They kept selling tapes after people stopped buying them.
Owners do the same thing. They keep a service line that eats time and makes no money. They keep a customer who pays late and complains every job. They keep a lead source that worked five years ago. Look at your last twelve months. If something gives you less every year for more effort, that is your sign to change course.
How do you avoid decision fatigue as the owner?
Cut the small decisions so you have energy for the big ones. Taryn says "decision fatigue is so real for so many entrepreneurs." All day the owner gets asked to pick the social post, the paint color, the schedule change.
Make a list of every decision you made last week. Circle the ones someone else could make with a simple rule. Write the rule and hand it off. Keep the calls that only you can make, like pricing, hiring and big customer promises.
How does the way you talk to yourself affect your business?
It shapes how you show up for your crew and your family. Taryn puts it this way: "the most important real estate that we own is not the house that we live in. It is the real estate of our own minds."
She gives a simple swap. Change "I have to go to this construction site" to "I get to go to this construction site." Most owners prayed for a second crew or a bigger job. When it comes, it is easy to treat it like a burden.
Try a one day check. Every time you catch yourself saying "I have to," stop and say "I get to." It sounds small. It changes how you lead.
Do resilient owners stop feeling fear?
No. They learn to act anyway. Taryn does not believe in being fearless. She says "we get to learn to fear less, to not allow fear to stop us." Without fear there is no courage, because "fear is a prerequisite for the transfer of courage."
The American Psychological Association says the same in its guide to building your resilience. Resilience is not a trait you either have or lack. It is a set of habits you can learn, like strong relationships, taking care of yourself and finding purpose.
Where should an owner start this week?
Start with one hard look and one change. Here are three steps.
Write down your last big setback and what it taught you. Pick one change and make it this week.
List one service, customer or lead source that keeps taking more and giving less. Decide to fix it or drop it.
Hand off five small decisions with a clear rule, so your energy goes to the calls that matter.
If you want tools to see where your time goes and what to hand off, start with the free workbooks on our Gathering The Kings tools page. To hear the full story, listen to Driven To Win episode 445 with Dr. Taryn Marie Stejskal.
This article was written by the Gathering The Kings team from Driven To Win episode 445 with Dr. Taryn Marie Stejskal.
