The Big Ticket Life: Healing Humans & Leveling Up
The Big Ticket Life: Healing Humans & Leveling Up
How can business owners overcome inherited trauma to improve leadership?
If you're into health and fitness, you're probably familiar with biohacking, where you can influence your genetics through specific actions. I believe the inverse is also true—when two people come together, the trauma they carry can be passed on to their children. Some may argue against that, but if we accept that we can hack our health, we also need to accept that inherited trauma exists. This belief is something people need to confront.
For me, what keeps me pushing forward is an ingrained belief, which took me a while to figure out, that things can be taken away from me. My great-grandfather, who emigrated to the U.S. through Ellis Island, wasn't a good man. He abandoned 10 children and divorced my great-grandmother under false pretenses, paying off a church father to declare her insane. This sense of loss has been passed down through generations, and I've seen how it affected my personal relationships and my parents, who worked for others as employees.
This belief—that things can be taken away through no fault of your own—drives me to take massive action. I focus on building a strong foundation to secure my position. At the same time, I’m committed to helping others level up and bring them along with me. One of my proudest success stories is an employee who started as a delivery driver, worked his way up to the sales floor, and is now in management at a large company. We gave him the launching pad, and now he’s thriving. That’s what I mean when I say we level up our people.
Why is it important for leaders to be open to ideas from their teams?
Becoming a good leader was something I had to learn the hard way. One key aspect is being vulnerable and realizing that your idea doesn’t always have to be the best one. In fact, you should surround yourself with people who can generate better ideas and create an environment where those ideas continually improve.
I’m a big fan of the TV show Mad Men, especially the part where Draper talks about running through bad ideas quickly to get to the good ones faster. That’s a valuable lesson for leadership—create an environment where bad ideas are tested and eliminated quickly, so the best ideas can rise to the top.
As a leader, it's important to fail fast, but the goal is to get to winning fast, too. If all we do is fail, we end up on a hamster wheel, learning but never advancing. We need to find a path to winning as quickly as possible. Part of that involves being vulnerable enough to let others win and take the credit, because ultimately, their success is your success.
What strategies help maximize profits without expanding locations?
We decided not to expand as originally planned, and in hindsight, it turned out to be the right decision, especially considering the past few years. Instead, we focused on maximizing what we could do within our current space. The idea was to take our existing four walls and operate like four or five successful stores in one location.
We focused on optimizing our operations, our team, and our ad spend, without the added stress of managing multiple locations. Personally, I don’t enjoy managing people—that’s where my business partner excels. I’m the visionary, and he handles management, which is why we complement each other so well. When I try to step into management, I usually mess things up, so I’ve learned to stay out of it.
We found that we could be more profitable, maintain our sanity, and have more freedom by focusing on our current operation. We asked ourselves, "How do we achieve the results of four or five good stores in just one location?" And we did it. Now, the business runs smoothly, consistently pays me, and I only need to be there two days a week. I spend about six hours on Mondays, and Thursdays can range from two to eight hours, depending on what’s needed.
How can business owners use customer data to boost in-store sales?
It all starts with "good in, good out." This simple concept applies to many professionals, especially I.T. professionals. It’s about maximizing every opportunity. For example, our book funnel starts with collecting a name and email. Then we offer to mail the physical book because it’s over 100 pages—something people likely won’t want to read as a PDF. We make the investment and mail it out, giving us a complete contact record.
Once we have that contact information, we use software to score the address. Does it align with the demographic and psychographic profiles we’ve invested in? If yes, it triggers a specific marketing path. If not, it goes to a different marketing path. The goal of all this is to drive people into the store where we do business. We're not an online company.
For a more personal approach, when we have someone in the store, I encourage the team to engage them tactfully. If a customer is purchasing a mattress, ask questions like, "Are the other mattresses in your home about the same age?" If the answer is yes, that opens up more opportunities, either today or in the future.
For example, if they mention having children, you can ask about their kids’ mattress needs, especially as they grow. If their kids are hitting a growth spurt, it’s a chance to suggest a new mattress in the coming years. By keeping these conversations open, we can follow up with targeted marketing later when the customer is ready to make another purchase.
Why should business owners prioritize family time?
When the scales are perfectly balanced, the meter reads zero. And I don’t want zero of anything in my life.
For me, balance means being fully present with my family. In my coaching group, Battlefield Alliance, we have a daily battle plan, and one of the habits is an hour of family time without screens. We're not perfect at it, but we try to connect as a family each day, even if it’s just for five minutes.
It’s getting more challenging as my kids grow older. My 16-year-old is deep into football, and I believe he can play Division I college football, so we’re fully supporting him on that journey. My other son works at Chick-fil-A, and there's talk of him joining the training team that travels nationwide to open new stores. It's an exciting opportunity, and we’re supporting him as well.
As for my wife, I love her deeply and try to show that every day, often through laughter. Recently, we were at our campsite—just the two of us—and we spent a Sunday morning laughing in bed for hours. It was one of those simple, memorable moments that matter most. Even if it’s only five minutes, creating those moments is so important.
*This interview has been edited and condensed for clarity.*
